Only three parts? you wonder. Ha! Of course it's MUCH MUCH more than that, but I only have so much time.
Today we start with my personal most hated: BEEFCAKE!
Many years ago, Beefcake! brought much needed irritation, annoyance, and some fear into our lives. His work was related to the fitness industry, yet he drank 4 2-litre bottles of Diet Dr Pepper per day. If you do the math, that equals disgusting.
Beefcake! also accomplished other amazing feats, such as the following:
- Sleeping for 21 hours straight when he came to visit us at Christmas.
- Forgoing the breakfast M cooked for him so he could eat at Wendy's.
- Stalking M after she dumped his ass. But the security staff at her work can tell you more about that than I can.
Oh, M, how could you have let such meaty goodness slip through your fingers? He even had his own basement bachelor apartment, complete with his favourites pages from Swank magazine. Tres chic.
Oh, Beefcake!, there's so much I wanted to say to you. But this will have to suffice.
And in M's defense (and normally I NEVER defend her), she was heavily medicated at the time.
26 comments:
Sleeping for 21 hours straight at the family Christmas. A classic gentleman.
Aaaaah!!! Ex-boyfriends are people I'd like to forget rather sooner than later...even other girl's x's. But I guess they're part of the learning process or whatever...
Yikes! ; (
Diet Dr Pepper + Sleeping 21 Hours + Stalking + Swank = Disgusting
I can't wait for more....please tell me Captain Beefcake wasn't the creepiest one!
I am totally hoping this series goes beyond 3 parts.
I once had a stalker (before the police cared about such things) I had never dated him but he stalked anyway. He did so many insane things, over a two year period, that I could write a book about him.
Perfect choice for most hated. H is justifiably angry with this one.
He also told our dad I was pregnant. As a joke. At Christmas.
Dennis thinks sleeping 21 hours is okay!
I'm so glad I never met this guy!!!
H, you have such a way with words. Bravo!
I shudder to think what my ex girlfriend would say about me.
"He never held me"
"He never told me I looked beautiful"
"He acted like he couldn't hear me."
I second that emotion! Was there no warning as to this fellow's disposition?
He probably looked good. Serves her right.
It would have been funnier if he'd actually gotten M pregnant and then left her at Christmas when the baby was born. (As a side note, all the best babies are born around Christmas.)
M deserves much much much much much better.
We can only hope that Beefcake went to live with the grizzlies deep in the wilderness somewhere.
Did he use your portable hair dryer to blow dry his private hair?
Personally, the best part is H flipping us the bird. Very neat. As for Beefcake... yeah, he sounds dreamy. But, there had to be SOMETHING that attracted M, well besides being heavily medicated...
Dennis eats food from Wendys. Dennis would eat out of Wendy's Dumpster.
perhaps you should have saved MOST HAted for last.
but maybe he wasn't most interesting eh?
I clicked too soon... how long did M date Beef?
I dont have any ex boyfriends,
but I have ex squirrel friends.
Beefcake sounds odious. he sounds like a vividblurry wannabe.
Le beefcake est un très mauvais et bad homme.
J'ai craché sur lui Tooi tooi tooi tooi!
Mademoiselle M. était trop joli pour le beefcake.
Thank you for your support in my choice of "most hated." Fortunately, Beefcake! could not be here to accept the award in person, so I'll keep it here with an open invitation to sit and spin. And not to worry, they did not date for very long.
I'm still thinking about whom to feature next. Like I said, there are sooooooooooo many choices. If I don't blog anymore after this weekend, you'll know that it's because M has killed me.
we had a small herd of Beefcakes on the Chedwick campus--The Delts, but they had just one insane destructive party too many in mid January and were tossed off campus for good. Chedwick University is Beefcake Free! We are enforcing our strict "No Nuckleheads" policy.
tell us more.. :)
Post a Comment